Once upon a time, I bought into the notion that women are each other’s worst enemies. I embraced this belief so much that, at one point, I proudly claimed to have only male friends and no female friends. The idea that I couldn’t trust women had become deeply ingrained in me.
However, upon reflection, I realized that most of the best things and experiences in my life were thanks to women. Women supported me during challenging times, shared my tears and joys, challenged me, and opened doors for me. They were there to share a drink when I needed to escape, and they binge-watched romcoms with me during heartbreaks. Women provided invaluable tips on navigating the corporate world. They were there for me, not always the same women and not always simultaneously, but they had been there.
Looking back, I noticed how many times I reached out to help a fellow woman and how often I took the time to listen to friends in need. I realized there was nothing extraordinary about my actions; it was just the norm.
Certainly, there were instances when colleagues, regardless of gender, disappointed me. Some took advantage or sabotaged me. However, I learned that these negative experiences were not about gender but rather about individuals being nasty and horrible. My male friends shared similar stories about male competition being challenging.
I won’t dismiss anyone’s experiences by claiming there are no women who treat other women poorly. There are indeed some who actively work against the progress of fellow women, consciously or unconsciously. They might block others from succeeding due to insecurity or a desire to be the only one in the room. However, I believe these instances are the minority.
I recently received feedback from a participant in one of my networking events who was pleasantly surprised by the focus on support over competition. The event format intentionally ensures that everyone feels they have something to offer, avoiding a dynamic where one side is begging and the other giving.
In conclusion, female rivalry is a myth. Just like in any group, there are good and bad individuals. There is nothing uniquely evil about women; in fact, we tend to be caring and open to vulnerability. Imagine the progress we could make if we accepted our unique strengths and reached out to help one another.
Happy Women’s Day!
